Being a father is really hard, and we can’t thank you enough. No, really. It’s literally impossible to heap sufficient praise on those who spend decades trying to turn sperm into a decent human.
Fortunately, you never give up, and for that we are eternally grateful.
Here is my Father’s Day wish for you:
- You can stay in the bathroom without anyone knocking on the door for as long as you like.
- You can watch whatever show you want for as long as you like without being interrupted.
- You can nap as long as you want.
- You aren’t asked to do ANYTHING. Even if it was supposed to already be done and you forgot.
- Your favorite snacks are stocked in the pantry.
- Your favorite drinks are stocked in the fridge
- You are thanked on the hour for all you do.
- You don’t have to go ANYWHERE unless you just want to.
- You have the kind of sex you had before you were a parent.
- You get some crappy homemade card that says you’re the best dad in the whole world. Because you are.
Happy Father’s Day!
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