Fabulously Refined/Wildy Inappropriate

I do not have weed in my freezer

I’m not into that, but I am into fresh herbs. This simple concoction of Italian parsley, thyme, rosemary (and garlic) makes everything taste like you care – hooray! Chop them finely, strain the parsley with cheesecloth, add salt and pepper and bread crumbs to keep it from getting soggy. Done. Prepping…

November 4, 2015

I finally learned my lesson

I regret being a birthday party fuckwit. Evidently this can happen to anyone with a vagina and a child under seven. Why? Because we’re chronically…
November 3, 2015

Order of Seven

Holy shit – do y’all know Beth Teliho? Ask her for her autograph now because she’s going to be famous SOON. Like this famous: I…
November 2, 2015

The Pen is not Mightier than the Lipstick

Anna: Can I write my spelling words on the bathroom mirror in lipstick? Me: What? Anna: It’s for practice tonight – one of our options.…
November 1, 2015

How to waste $500 in three seconds

Back into the parked car in your driveway….Boom. $500 insurance deductible spent. Go into house and notify fiance you have wrecked your car, by smashing…