How to be a superhero in one day

Raise your hand if this has happened to you:

You know a birthday is coming up.

You intend to send a card.

The birthday comes and goes.

You think:  I can send a belated birthday card.

Two more weeks pass.

You think:  now it’s too late to send a card.

I’m an asshole.

********

I can’t see anyone’s hands, but I’ll assume at least one person has shared this experience with me.  Well no more, my friends.  I’ve discovered a better way.

  1.  Buy a bunch of greeting cards for all occasions – thank you, birthday, sympathy, just because, etc.  I pick up stacks of them periodically, and make sure to visit at least one paper shop when I’m traveling.

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2.  File the cards by occasion.  I have a crappy greeting card box, but this one is on my Christmas list.

3.  Check your calendar on the first Sunday of the month and make a list of the birthdays, anniversaries, and whatever else you need to acknowledge.

4.  Put on your most comfy clothes, get in your favorite chair, head for the couch, your bed, or wherever you can spread out and chill.

5.  Write out your cards, address them, apply the correct postage, and put sticky notes on them indicating the date they need to be mailed.  This gives you all the time you need to write a truly thoughtful card instead of rushing through it just to get it in the mail on time.

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6.  Since you’re already in greeting card mode, this is a perfect time to write a few personal notes to let people know how important they are to you, or how much they suck, or why they owe you money.

7.  Keep your stack of ready-to-mail cards in a place you’ll be sure to see them.

8.  Mail them on the appropriate date.

9.  Congratulate yourself every time you mail one.

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10.  Choose your superhero costume because now you possess the super-awesome skill of being thoughtful in the most efficient way possible.

What household efficiencies have you developed or discovered that make your life easier?  What’s YOUR superpower?

Comments

  1. What’s the threshold when it becomes too late to send the card “late.” I say after a week you should just forget about it.

    I keep blank cards in my travel bag. I pick one up every once in a while. It might stay there for nine months but eventually, it’ll save my life.

    • Brilliant! I agree with you – after a week just forget it. Send them a card for no real reason a month later and mention you hope they had a lovely birthday. Thanks for chiming in Mark – you’re the best!

  2. Is it wrong that I sort of find your insanity arousing? Lol. My birthday is March 7, btw. Please send me gifts.

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