How to be a superhero in one day

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Raise your hand if this has happened to you:

You know a birthday is coming up.

You intend to send a card.

The birthday comes and goes.

You think: ย I can send a belated birthday card.

Two more weeks pass.

You think: ย now it’s too late to send a card.

I’m an asshole.

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I can’t see anyone’s hands, but I’ll assume at least one person has shared this experience with me. ย Well no more, my friends. ย I’ve discovered a better way.

  1. ย Buy a bunch of greeting cards for all occasions – thank you, birthday, sympathy, just because, etc. ย I pick upย stacks of them periodically, and make sure to visit at least one paper shop when I’m traveling.

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2. ย File the cards by occasion. ย I have a crappy greeting card box, but this one is on my Christmas list.

3. ย Check your calendar on the first Sunday of the month and make a list of the birthdays, anniversaries, and whatever else you need to acknowledge.

4. ย Put on your most comfy clothes, get in your favorite chair, head for the couch, your bed, or wherever you can spread out and chill.

5. ย Write out your cards, address them, apply the correct postage, and put sticky notes on them indicating the date they need to be mailed. ย This gives you all the time you need to write a truly thoughtful card instead of rushing through it just to get it in the mail on time.

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6. ย Since you’re already in greeting card mode, this is a perfect time to write a few personal notes to let people know how important they are to you, or how much they suck, or why they owe you money.

7. ย Keep your stack of ready-to-mail cards in a place you’ll be sure to see them.

8. ย Mail them on the appropriate date.

9. ย Congratulate yourself every time you mail one.

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10. ย Choose your superhero costume because now you possess the super-awesome skill of being thoughtful in the most efficient way possible.

What household efficiencies have you developed or discovered that make your life easier? ย What’s YOUR superpower?

5 responses to “How to be a superhero in one day”

  1. What’s the threshold when it becomes too late to send the card “late.” I say after a week you should just forget about it.

    I keep blank cards in my travel bag. I pick one up every once in a while. It might stay there for nine months but eventually, it’ll save my life.

    1. Brilliant! I agree with you – after a week just forget it. Send them a card for no real reason a month later and mention you hope they had a lovely birthday. Thanks for chiming in Mark – you’re the best!

  2. Is it wrong that I sort of find your insanity arousing? Lol. My birthday is March 7, btw. Please send me gifts.

    1. Hahaha – I’ll take appreciation for my OCD tendencies in any form it’s available. Thank you! XO

    2. Also your birthday has been officially added to the calendar ๐Ÿ˜ƒ

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